Do you do this?

Hi love, 

I was recently asked what the purpose of a relationship is and here’s how I answered – The purpose of a relationship is to get to experience the fullness of who you are and grow closer to God.  

God = unconditional Love. 

God = the universal energy of Love that we ALL have access to 

When our hearts are closed, we don’t have access to any of it. We don’t have access to our true selves and we don’t have access to Love. This is how we stay stuck. This is also the WORST part of Disney fairytales – convincing us that the only way to “wake up” is to be “kissed” by a knight in shining armor. 

Love IS an awakening process and LONG BEFORE your Lover arrives may you choose to awaken into the truth of who you are. 

Because guess what?

Your true self attracts true Love,

and ONLY your true self. 

I’ve been coaching for 7 years, and most of my clients stories and my own have to do with thinking I have to “behave a certain way in order to find Love.” 

Are you a shape-shifter? 

I remember pretending liking certain bands in order for guys to be interested in me. 

I remember pretending to be into a certain activity, when I wasn’t at all, in order to be liked. 

I remember never really knowing how to actually be myself, because I didn’t know who I was. 

I was who the world wanted me to be. 

Remember good ‘ol Cosmpolitan magazine? (Does anyone even read magazines anymore?) The whole front cover of the magazine is about WHAT TO DO FOR HIM. Give me a break. 

I have really great news. 

YOU ARE THE SECRET SAUCE. 

There is someone who will want YOU and ONLY YOU but what you FIRST HAVE TO DO IS BE YOURSELF. 

And OWN who you are. 

KNOW you are enough.

KNOW you are worthy. 

Recently a client shared this with me and I had to share it with you because it describes exactly what happens when you OWN WHO YOU ARE (you become rejection PROOF!) 

“I am noticing a huge shift in dating. I’ve had a few conversations go dead, where guys just ghost.  Or a few that “match” with me but don’t respond.  In the past, I would have probably micromanaged my profile and/or emails to see what I did wrong and then would have changed things so that people might like me more.  I realize how much I was putting on a mask of who I thought people wanted me to be.  This time I’m just shrugging my shoulders and saying “Oh well! Not my guy”. Not everyone wants a cute, 5’1″ science geek and that’s totally ok!  I remember the last time I tried online dating, I seriously was messing with my profile all the time trying to make myself sound better (but in reality I was sounding like someone else).  I’m not doing that this time.  I’m being me and I know the right guy is gonna LOVE who I am.” 

!!!!!!!!!!!

She knows the right guy is gonna love who she is BECAUSE SHE LOVES WHO SHE IS.

Shape-shifting is a SYMPTOM. A symptom of a lack of self love, a symptom of not believing you are enough. This what kills me about dating strategy. NO STRATEGY can mask not feeling good enough.

Self love comes first. 

Knowing who you are comes first. 

Authenticity is a practice. 

You do have to commit to it because someone can’t fall in love with you and love you for who you are if you’re not BEING YOURSELF. 

If you’re struggling with feelings of not being good enough, not worthy and deserving of true love, or questioning whether or not you’ll ever find the right person for you, I’m here. Let’s talk. 

HUNDREDS of women have walked this path with me so while you are VERY unique, you are not so special that it *won’t* work for you. 

It works. Love always does.